Good Morning! I have a lot on my heart this morning. I thought, “I will just write, and see what comes of this, “being real……” You know?
This morning, I had a lot to do, and I heard of this person (a young woman) who wanted to have a babysitter for a missions trip. As quick as lightning, it took me back to a problem I had, while Trying to serve on the Worship team at church.
I was about her age, and I was living for Jesus, full throttle. This meant I wasn’t having a lot of fun (in the natural) No drinking, no trips, fun was a rare commodity, and so was eating out. So worship team, now that was good, clean fun!
We had practice, were all in harmony, and I got up there to sing on a Sunday Morning. A family member had agreed to watch my children, during the service. To my horror, My kids went scattering around the church, and one was crawling under the pews. The Family member had gone to the restroom, told them to sit still. Well, they didn’t sit still. Even More horrifying, when the pastor pointed at me and in front of the whole congregation said: “You need to go take care of your children.”
Not asking for sympathy here, but the story of this woman just “took me back,” and I found myself thinking okay, do I pray she has a better outcome? Well, of course I do!
I’ve been struggling lately, with people who seem to lack empathy. They give pat answers, tell me how they struggle too so that should make it all better. I miss the days of praying for each other, and it makes me sad when people Self-Righteously “DECIDE” what is a worthy prayer request, and what isn’t.
On being Liberal. I am liberal (and generous) with the benefits of God. I believe in Grace, Mercy, Healing, Forgiveness. I believe God is liberal (and generous) In all his ways. So really? I am a true liberal at heart!
But from what I’ve seen in politics, it often means, “lets give liberally to my agenda,” and have understanding about what I care about, and the rest of you can go to *$)#!”
That’s not liberal. That is just mean-spirited!
SO, PTSD is a new diagnosis, for trauma from the past erupts, and makes it difficult for us to make good choices (in a nutshell.) I think a lot of people have this, even on a minor scale. They have been hurt, just like I was that day on the worship team. I can never get that time in my life again, and I felt robbed of a chance to have some healthy fun. Now I have a choice don’t I (from all the trauma I”ve experienced?)
I can go out and make laws (to make sure I don’t get hurt, ever again) Or I can rally a big protest (because of my pain) Or…………..(OR) I can just ask God to heal me, and count it as Justice! I want restoration, more than I want compensation. A healed and restored life is the best Justice (and revenge!) Because truly then we know The enemy DID NOT WIN! God has healed me of a lot! I am aware each time he heals another area of my soul (He restores my SOUL Psalm 23 Amen?) But it’s a process, and not overnight.
Just pondering my choices today, and asking God for healing, deliverance, Restoration, and all great things from him! He is my God! He is my source! And he is my healer!
I have this feeling I will never regret this choice (Putting it all before him, and trusting him about the outcome!) Yep I’m 100 percent positive in My Faith, It’s a choice I will never regret. I have 30 years behind me, of Testimonies of God’s faithfulness & Love.
How about you?
Author and minister for the Lord Jesus Christ.