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Grief and Pain (no, you are not stupid).

tears and sorrow

Having Grief and Pain (You’re not stupid!) 
One thing I’ve not been known to ever do, is to call people’s 
feelings stupid (or dumb, or even wrong). I’ve learned some 
times the hard way our feelings should not dominate us, but 
at the same time, I know we have them. Grief comes in many 
forms, and sometimes people who can’t cry get very angry 
instead. Maybe they won’t cry because someone said it’s 
stupid, or maybe because it embarrasses them. 
You won’t catch me telling you there are right or wrong things 
to grieve about either. These ideas such as “There are starving
children somewhere” so be grateful for your plate of liver” or 
platitudes such as: “Well at least you are alive, or if one of your
children died, you still have the other” do not really help people 
feel better. Do they? Not very often. I would say mostly, not. 
People hire therapists in part, because they fear telling friends, 
family, and yes even pastors at times, their deepest thoughts 
and fears. They have grief and want to get over it. Sometimes 
the grief “seems to be” over something stupid. The fear that 
someone will call them stupid, makes them want to hide. 
“I AM SO STUPID!” (I have said that myself) When I am very 
frustrated for giving that person another chance (and they did 
that to me again!) Or I dared to dream, and now I’m disappointed
(again for the 14th time, or even the 100th time). 
I should never say that but, I have. Why? Why do we chastize our
selves like that? 
#1 We see others getting over it, so we think we are failures
#2 We think our grief is “stupid” to begin with. (not important). 
#3 We don’t understand where this grief is coming from or even how to stop it. 
Therapy sometimes goes too far in perpetuating our grief, (getting 
us to feel sorry for ourselves, which can lead to depression) 
God tells us to “be of good cheer” but sometimes, we can’t. We 
are sad. We need to cry. It’s called grieving. 
King David danced, but he also wept about sin and disappointment. 
Jeremiah wept over the sins of God’s people. 
Jonah got depressed because God did not destroy Ninevah after he 
delivered a word that it would be destroyed. Job got depressed too. 
I believe part of soul-healing is talking about it. Whether you talk to 
God about it, or someone else. Ministers like TD Jakes talk about their
soul being torn, ripped apart, dreams going out the window, and feeling
like God didn’t care (for awhile) about their pain. This is why people love
to read their stories. They can relate. 
We need teachers and we need prophets, but we need pastors too. 
Pastors tend to be nurturing people. They love and tend to the sheep. 
If they are not this way, perhaps they should not have been pastors. 
But in the world of men, There are not any paying postions for a lot 
of the other ministries (which is sad). They are forced to ask for money
continually, because nobody offers them a home, or a paycheck. 
Those people have dreams too (you see) And it’s a heart to reach the
lost, the hurting, the broken, and the dying. They can’t get there without
someone’s help. I just put one of my dreams on the Altar, because unless
God sends a way to provide for it, I just can’t do it anymore. 
It’s called “Authoring books” to reach the hurting. I can’t afford what it costs anymore, so I have to stop. My paychecks are like .01 (last quarter) for this endeavor. I’ve been doing it for 7 years now, and it pays nothing. And it’s okay but it still hurts to have dreams come to an end. I have to stop now. Until God provides for it. If he doesn’t, oh well! I will still love him just the same. 
And no I don’t want sympathy- but I have some grief right now. God will 
surely bring me out of it too. He always does! He is faithful! I have faced many disappointments in my life. And I will live through this one, too. 
As a minister and a child of God I find that “letting go” is one of the most 
painful things I have ever experienced. Letting go of what you know is bad
is hard, but letting go of something you thought was good is even harder. 
I am reminded of the following scripture in regardes to self-preservation. 
When you are done grieving, consider putting it all in God’s hands. 
We really are better off to put our lives in the Lord’s hands and say “Thy will 
be done, thy kingdom come, on earth, as it is in heaven.” Amen. 
Today is November 1. Happy Author’s day. I just layed my 7 year Journey 
of writing books at the Lord’s feet. 
Matthew 16:25 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake, will find it.  Peace out (for now) Laura Grace 
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Relationships! no more drama, not even for your mama! by Laura Grace

Relationships! Introduction: By Laura Grace Should I give up, shut up, put up my dukes? 

Relationships are one of the hardest things we will ever contend with in this life. Frankly Not a subject I have wanted to contend with OR address. Even in my book Grace to Grow, I talked about it being hard. but I didn’t say a whole lot about it. That’s because it’s not cut and dry. Every relationship is different. There are variations (Within) and while we all know there are basic principles in the word of God how do we know Which Principle to apply?

I’m going to address hard truths, talk about real situations, and share with you what God 
has taught me thus far about relationships……..

What about giving up? Did I fail that person? How do I know? How do I get closure when they won’t talk to me anymore?

How do I love them- yet avoid the drama? AS we begin……Let’s Ponder Matthew in chapter 5 where Jesus said “Blessed are the peacemakers” …….(Matthew 5:9) and 
explore how we make peace (in various ways) as we are BECOMING children of God.

Yes, I said becoming. (You’re being formed and shaped here, into his image!) Amen

“Father please, be with me as I do this series and I know you will be. Allow me to share from your heart to theirs “what works” and what does not work! For you already know! and you know all the persons out there who wonder about how you said make peace but yet you said at times there will be no peace in certain relationships…..

 

Give us understanding we pray (Father) In Jesus’ name. and we thank you for it too. 

 I ask you Father help us to undertand your word better, and how to apply it in everyday life! IN Jesus’ name! -amen

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A little humility never killed anyone: the story of the dog lady and the big injustice

The story of the dog lady and the big injustice…….by Laura Grace (this is important) and you will see God in this and humility and repentance ….and 
a lot of other things…..

A few years ago we had trouble with the dog lady. someone complained our dogs were barking, I tried to get them to stop but they kept on barking so …..soon I was threatened with a ticket. I was frustrated, upset …….

I remember asking how long is too much barking she said 5 min. we had to buy bark collars, expensive, keep them loaded with batteries (more expense) They ran out quick too.

I Kept the dogs in a lot, scolded them, tried to train them never to bark. Kids teased them, they barked more when that happened.

More threats of tickets………

I got mad at the dog lady, yelled at her, complained about the whole dog thing in the newspaper. I was fit to be fried. thought it was so unfair………
Other dogs got to bark. It was daytime! the kids were teasing them! 
couldn’t anyone see the injustice I thought?

but she was just doing her job. and, she was.

3 or 4 years has gone by, the main barker (Happy) has passed away now. I didnt think about it anymore didn’t think I held a grudge or anything. today I prayed for JOY and said to God I will do whatever you say, whatever you say. I just need my JOY back! Anyway so God says to me “flowers, the dog lady” so I went and said which ones. bought flowers, wrote a card….

Went to town hall……I said “where’s the dog lady?” “in there” I went into the police area. “where is the dog lady?” I said. ‘right there (she was behind me) I held out the flowers “these are for you” I said…….”For me? why?” she said all amazed “Well i was mad at you for coming after me about my dogs and well…..I’m sorry. you were just doing your job I said. “tears” flowed, me, crying, her the other lady standing there….hugs………..tears….her saying Yeah people are mad at me all the time I’m just doing my job, she said More hugs…I went away.

I left there and felt like 100 pounds of weight left me. And I had JOY Once again. thanks God! YOU ARE so good! and so smart! and so much wiser than I am! and a great therapist!

Praise the Lord! Laura Grace

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Lofty Lucy’s….Who are they fooling I wonder? Not even themselves!

She’s so right isn’t she? So confident in her own (Picture) Of herself she has in her mind! “Lofty Lucy” she is everywhere. 

I’ve had more people give me advice (their two cents worth) than I can shake a stick at, in my life time. What do you do with people like that? (Mostly, I ignore them!). 

Sometimes, I endure them. Mostly, people who act like they know everything, wind up being examples of who “we don’t want to be,” and sadly, most of the time they are pretty clueless about what is going on.

Why Do people love Peanuts cartoons? Well, because they tell the truth, they tell a story, one the most of us have lived (to some degree) and can relate to. 

I just brushed off another “Lofty Lucy” comment, just a few minutes ago. She was clueless about how childish she sounded. I think to myself “How sad,” For I really would have liked to have a meaningful conversation with you…..even a deeper relationship. But, it’s not going to happen, because lofty Lucy (For today anyway) refuses to grow up.

What about you? Moving forward in the personal Growth department?” I hope so! You will like yourself better if you do this, and God will be so happy! 

Laura Grace, author speaker, blogger, prayer warrior, and friend of God.